Alethes could see that Viggo was struggling under the weight of his loss, but he kept pushing forward. If they were to make it to the ruins of Narsil's castle by nightfall, there could be no slacking. Whinnem and Polaris walked at a steady pace between galloping, and much of the journey was spent in silence. About halfway there, they stopped to eat, stretch their legs, and give the horses a break. Sitting against a tree, Viggo pulled his sahnis out of his satchel and began to play a melody. It didn't sound like an entirely sad song, but it wasn't a happy one either. Alethes couldn't tell if it was the song or the circumstances under which she was hearing it, but at times it sounded hopeful, at other times it sounded lamentful, and still other times it sounded like a call to fight.
"That could be the most beautiful thing I've ever heard," she said when he put his sahnis down.
"My ma always said so," Viggo said quietly, opening his satchel to receive the instrument. "I called it 'A Shepherd's Musing.'"
"That's fitting if you're the shepherd," she said. "I can imagine your thoughts would sound like that if they were expressed in music."
"Yeah," he said. "I took the liberty to call myself a shepherd even though I don't have sheep."
"Goats are almost the same," Alethes said.
"Technically I'm supposed to be called a 'goatherd,'" he said. "But I didn't want to be confused with my herd of actual goats when I was a teenager and Drea said it sounded stupid anyway."
"She wasn't wrong," Alethes snickered.
"Nope," he said, rising to his feet. "We better get going."
As they climbed onto their horses and began to move forward, Alethes said, "I remembered something last night."
"Good," he said. "What was it?"
His voice lacked the enthusiasm that usually characterized it when asking such questions. She knew he wanted to know about her memories, but it didn't change the fact that his heart was broken and he didn't have the strength to act like it wasn't. "The reason I was in the woods in the first place," she said, hoping the mystery-solving would cheer him up. "I was running away. I wanted to go somewhere away from Miras where no one would know me and I could try to live a normal life."
"That makes sense," he said. "That's why you were hiding from your memories. But why were you running away?"
She sighed. Looking at Viggo and the unfairness of his life, she was ashamed to complain about her own lot. But she told him the truth: "I was tired of the whole thing - tired of following my convictions and sacrificing everything I wanted in life without seeing any fruits of my labors. My calling was lonely. Nobody would listen. If they wanted to listen to a woman, they would open Narsil's books and not have to change their way of thinking or open their minds at all. And they wouldn't accept that I had a spiritual calling, because I wasn't a man. They told me to humble myself and find a man to settle down with and raise a family. And that hurt so much because that was all I wanted to do, yet they were saying it was pride and stubbornness that kept me from going that route when in reality, it was my most painful sacrifice." Her eyes started to tear up, and she stopped talking before her voice would give way.
"I can understand how that would feel," Viggo said. "They tell you to humble yourself when that's all you're doing and they know nothing of sacrifice. No one should have to make a choice between their convictions and their dreams. But when you come between a rock and a hard place and have to make that choice, it reveals your true colors. You have solid character, Alethes. Don't ever believe that's a bad thing."
"I know that," she said, "but it means so much to hear you say it."
After a moment of silence, Viggo asked, "So, what did you hope to gain by running away?"
"I hoped I could find something to do that people would appreciate," she confessed, "something they would consider valid."
"Valid," he repeated. "So you ran away looking for validation. Did you find it where you ended up?"
She looked down and laughed. "Actually, I guess I did."
"How so?"
"Your strong faith," she said, "and that of your mother."
"Oh," he said, pretending to be surprised. "So tell me, did we tell you anything about yourself and your calling that you didn't already know?"
"No," she smiled. "You just helped me remember what I'd already discovered and believe in what I already knew."
"So then," he said in conclusion, "where does validation come from? From what others think of you, or what your heart tells you?"
Her heart overflowed with gratitude and love. "You're absolutely right," she said, then laughed, "Where have you been all these years? You're ahead of your time. Are you sure you haven't been stolen from the future?"
He laughed. "No, I'm pretty sure the year 196 is where I belong."
"Year 196?" she asked in disbelief.
"Yes, year 196," Viggo snickered. "What year are you lost in?"
"It's only year 174, isn't it?" Alethes asked.
"Umm," Viggo said slowly, wondering how she could be that confused, "no, it's definitely not. We would be toddlers if it was."
"Toddlers?" she repeated. "But I was born in 150. Are you playing with me?"
He looked at her dumbfounded.
"Okay," she said, "you're serious. I'm confused."
"My mother was born in 150," he said. "So unless you've found some fountain of youth and you're 20 years older than you look--"
She exhaled in disbelief. "Of course not," she said. "I don't know Viggo. I must be really confused. I thought this whole time we were living in 174."
He shook his head and laughed, "Well, you're right about one thing: I am ahead of your time. Who knows? Maybe I am from the future." He grinned.
Accepting that they weren't going to be able to make sense out of this confusion now, they decided to quit trying for the moment and pick up the pace. It wasn't very practical to talk while galloping, but thinking could be done. And as they neared the ruins of the castle, Alethes couldn't help but think about other things that had never added up since she fell in the woods and was saved by Viggo. Why did every memory of home seem to have taken place in the home of Epifany's childhood? How did Whinnem know to go there? Why did she keep dreaming she was on the floor of the woods and hadn't been rescued? Why did Viggo and his family seem so familiar to her?
Soon they reached the castle and crossed the bridge. "Well," Viggo said, dismounting and petting Polaris, "I'm not sure what we're looking for or where it would be."
"It's this way," Alethes said, sliding off Whinnem and pointing straight ahead. "It'll take us to the highest tower."
"What's in the highest tower?" he asked as they walked inside the castle.
"I don't know," she said.
"So what makes you think that's what we're looking for?" he questioned.
"I don't know," she said. "Intuition. It's what my heart tells me. For once I feel like I'm ahead of the confusion and know where I'm going."
Viggo chuckled. "Well I'm not complaining," he said as they reached the staircase and began to ascend. "I'll gladly follow someone who knows where they're going."
They followed the winding stairs higher and higher until they began to feel dizzy. "It's a lot higher than it looks from the outside," Viggo said, gripping the railing to steady himself.
"It is!" Alethes agreed, feeling like she was getting closer to meeting her destiny with every step. Their feet grew heavy and their legs sore as they followed the never-ending upward spiral, but they kept going until at last they reached a landing and no more steps.
"Look at this!" Viggo said breathlessly, leaning on a window sill and taking in the view. Alethes stood beside him and gazed out the window. "You can see the whole kingdom from here," he said. The sun was setting behind them and bright rays shot through the windows of the slowly disintegrating castle, tinting the atmosphere with hints of color below them. Several ophrysials could be seen, like tiny glass marbles reflecting the fiery light of the sun. Rivers and trees decorated the hills and valleys and plains of the wilderness that had harbored their persecuted ancestors. Alethes could think of no place she would be more proud to call "home," no matter the struggles.
She pulled the old silver key out of her pocket and looked at the symbol questioningly, then turned it over and read the engraving on the back. "Enlighten your eyes," she said aloud.
"Here," Viggo said, approaching a door. "The symbol's on the knob."
Alethes slowly stepped toward the door. Her hand trembled as she carefully inserted the key into the keyhole, and Viggo waited in breathless anticipation as she turned the knob. When she pulled it open, a mouse scurried out past them, leaving nothing but an empty closet behind.
"Well, so much for that," Viggo yawned, closing the door again. "It's getting late. We're going to have to find someplace to sleep."
Alethes knitted her brows and looked at the key again. Enlighten your eyes. Enlighten your eyes, she thought.
"No," she said, realization dawning on her. "I can't sleep. I have to wake up." She remembered the impression she'd received while pleading with Gadriel the night before, but with new understanding, and in awe she looked at the strong young man standing before her.
"What do you mean, 'wake up?'" Viggo asked.
"There's still hope for you, Viggo," she said. "None of this has happened to you. And it won't, I'll make sure."
"I don't understand," he said, looking troubled.
"And you don't have to," she said. "It was never your burden. It was mine. And you've given me everything I need to bear it. It's not too late!"
"Too late for what?" he asked.
"The awakening," she said, throwing her arms around him. "I only wish I didn't have to leave you."
"You don't," he said, holding on firmly. "Where are you going?"
"I'm going home," she said, "and I'm taking everything you've taught me."
"Can't I go with you?" he asked.
"Not yet," she said, releasing him and looking into his soft eyes. "Your time has not yet come. You are so precious to me and I couldn't be more proud of you. But you have a higher destiny than this, and I need to secure it for you and your sister and your generation."
Tears formed in both of their eyes. "So what should I do?" he asked, like a trusting child.
"You will rest," she said, "until you are awakened, and we meet again. I'll see you soon, in a better place."
She reached for the doorknob again, turned it, and gently pulled. Light began to pour through the slowly widening slit, flooding into the desolate tower until Viggo faded from her view and she was blinded by the bright white glory.
Birds sang and crickets chirped in the woods as the sun began to set over Battle Creek. Darkness slowly moved out of the way as her eyes fluttered gently, allowing the light to reveal the shining leaves in the trees above her. A horse blustered behind her where she lay, then its large nose swept over her ear, sniffing loudly, then sneezed dryly, blowing her hair into her face. "Whinnem!" she scolded with a laugh, turning her face to see her longtime friend through strands of tangled hair. Slowly, she propped herself onto her elbow, then sat up. She was a little dizzy and could feel a sore bump on her head, but was otherwise fine. Silver light sparkled on the ground several feet away from her, and she crawled over to pick up her key. Looking at it, she saw the engraving, "EYE," and behind it, her vague reflection.
But it was Viggo's face that lingered in her mind's eye, and his story, along with that of his family and friends, that she held in her heart. Each one had taught her and inspired her in their own unique way, awakening her to the light and privilege that accompanied her great responsibility. She knew now that her sacrifices were not in vain, that her choices did make a difference, and that one day, those whose opinion she valued most would thank her. They would be safe, secure, and free. And no price was too high for that assurance. She knew her path would not be easy, but the burden was lighter than ever, and she believed that the one who had called her would be faithful to accomplish her destiny.
She closed her hand over the key determinedly and rose to her feet, brushing the dust off herself. "I'll see you again," she smiled. "When morning comes."