Ajnin was angry. He swung the blade a little harder than was really necessary for his task of thinning out the weeds on the land surrounding Torvial's inn where he was staying. Contrary to what one might conclude, Ajnin was not doing this rough task to earn his keep. No, this job was self-imposed. Torvial had said he could stay a month without paying or doing anything. Torvial had a new Miran tunic.
And it wasn't even giving up his tunic that he was angry about. It was the reason why he had traded it for a place to stay. In Chang Khu. In early May. When he and Drea should have been on their way to see her mother and her brother. But here he was, still in Chang Khu and chopping green things for no other reason than the fact that he was angry and wanted to chop things. Plus there wasn't much else to do. He wondered if she devoted her life to chopping snakes for the same reason he was chopping weeds now - anger. That's a lot of anger, he thought. But he'd always known she had a temper.
However, at the moment, Ajnin was more mad at himself than he was at her. It was a strange new feeling. But as he thought about the events of the past month, and how he'd come to Torvial a week ago and gave him the shirt off his back for a place to stay instead of leaving without Drea, he felt he could only blame himself. "Why do I do these things?" he muttered under his breath as he hacked away. "Like I'm determined to make my own life difficult." He and Drea had hardly talked since the big blowup a month before. Yet he'd spent more of that time pining away than he cared to think about right now. "She's selfish--" he swung the blade left-- "she's disrespectful--" he swung it right-- "she's a hypocrite!"
He'd been thinking about some of the things he hated most about her, such as her accusation that he thought he was so much better than others. Yet she was always implying that she was better than him. And the fact that she complained about her dad not being good to his family and forcing his religion on her. While Ajnin still looked up to Hapak as a beloved leader and lifetime friend, he wasn't blind to the truth in those complaints. But in his opinion, Drea was too much like her dad in those ways to have any right to talk. Her ambition for her "freedom" and money was more important to her than her family, and she sure liked to force her ideas, if his experience with her was any indication.
"Why do I try so hard? Why should I care? Why have I been holding on?" he implored. "Stupid, stupid, stupid!" he scolded himself, landing three fast blows in the grass.
"I think you've cut it short enough there," a voice said behind him.
He turned around quickly to see Neenan's round old face smiling at him. "Yeah," he said, looking at the short grass in front of his feet, "I should probably move over now."
"Oh goodness, no!" she protested, "Darkness is falling. You should come in and clean up and have a treat!"
"Well, when you say it that way," he chuckled. But he wasn't smiling his usual charming smile.
"Is something on your mind, son?" she asked with a look of concern.
"Yes," he said without hesitation, "as a matter of fact, there is something on my mind. And it's probably about time I got it out of my mind and never entertained it again!" And he put the blade in its place more gently than he wanted to.
"Oh dear," Neenan sighed, "then it can only be a girl."
"It can only be," he agreed. "It's enough to drive a guy crazy. Nothing and no one else can make me so mad. And the worst part is that it's my fault for not forgetting her long before now."
"It's that Adder girl, isn't it?" she asked.
"Yep."
"I've seen you," she said, "making your way out to that tree. But it's been a while since I saw you go out that way. Did something happen?"
"We had a big disagreement and I found out it doesn't do much good to try to talk to her." He frowned as he followed her inside.
"Well," she said, "I know it won't be the same, but why don't you sit down at the table here and talk to me for a while. You might feel better." And she handed him a wet cloth to clean his face with, then went to retrieve supper, returning with bread and a jar of purple preserves.
"What's that?" he asked, washing his hands as he always did before meals.
"It's mulu preserves, made fresh today!"
"That's not that yellow fruit I got down the street, is it?" he asked.
"Probably," Neenan answered. "It's yellow and doesn't taste like food before it ripens. But after the skin turns red, the flesh is purple and sweet underneath. Don't be afraid - here, I'll have some first." And she opened the jar.
"No, I trust you," he said. "You can put some on my bread too."
After she spread some chunky purple goo on two pieces of bread and handed one to Ajnin, they both sunk their teeth in. And they began to smile and raise their eyebrows at each other. "It's good?" she asked, nodding.
"It's so much more than good," he replied with his mouth half full, and they both laughed and enjoyed the treat silently for a moment. His mood began to lift and his old confidence return. Then she broke the silence. "You see Ajnin," she said, gesturing with the bread in her hand, "here's your problem: you can have the sweet stuff, or you can try the bitter stuff. They're both out there. But you keep trying the same old yellow fruit, and it's bitter every time." She took another bite, and continued, "What you need to do, is choose the sweet stuff."
"What sweet stuff?" he laughed, rolling his eyes.
"Oh I know," she agreed, rolling her own eyes, "there is always that question." She took a bite. "And never that answer, is there?" she laughed. He nodded, feeling the hints of the pain coming back, and turned to his treat for comfort.
"But then - well, I probably shouldn't say anything," she said, waving her hand as if to dismiss an idea.
"Isn't that how it always starts," he snickered.
"Of course it is," she laughed, then wiped the crumbs off her hands. "But I suppose it can't hurt to tell you. I think Mordramah likes you."
Ajnin grinned. "There's nothing serious there."
"Oh, but that doesn't mean there shouldn't be," Neenan said, raising her eyebrows. "How old is that Adder girl anyway?"
"She's 20, and her name's actually Drea. We grew up together, but since I'm four years older than her, I never really thought of her in that way until we were older. Of course she probably never has - at least not seriously anyway."
"See," Neenan said, "you need someone more mature. This... Drea... she likes to run around, have fun, do her own thing, right? And she's obviously disagreeable. You'd rather settle down a bit, maybe have a family?"
"Sounds about right, yeah," he answered.
"And I know your religion's important to you. Now what beautiful woman do we know who takes an interest in your beliefs? Other than me - you're just a bit too young for me, I regret to tell you."
"Oh, Neenan," he sighed, feigning sorrow, "that hurts. You break my heart."
"I know, but it's the way it has to be," she answered. "Besides, we wouldn't want Torvial angry with you. He already took your tunic, and you haven't even seen him mad. So it can't be me. But Mordramah on the other hand - she's 21, she's mature for her age, she's pretty, and she'd be quite a catch if you ask me."
Ajnin stroked his chin. "You think so?" he asked.
"Oh yes," she answered. "Hardworking, handsome young man like you - you deserve a good young woman. You wouldn't want to let her get away. And we already know you love her cooking." She winked.
"I do?"
"Yes, she made the preserves you can't get enough of. She helps me out with various things. See, you wouldn't know it, but I'm getting up there in age. I can't do everything myself anymore. I was thinking about having her bring the meals for me and in fact, I was going to send her over tomorrow with your breakfast. You don't mind, do you?"
"Of course! That's no problem," he answered.
Before falling asleep that night, Ajnin decided it couldn't hurt to explore the possibilities of Neenan's suggestion. It would be nice to have a distraction. And if he was officially going to move on, having someone to potentially move on to would make it easier. And it wasn't like Mordramah was any less Miranite than Drea was at this point. So when Mordramah showed up the next morning, he was ready. "Ooh, what'd you bring me?" he greeted her with a big smile, leaning on the doorway.
"Your favorite, I'm told," she answered, carrying bread and mulu preserves to the table.
"Thanks, I'm starving!"
"Well, Neenan asked me to bring someone breakfast, and I'd do anything for that woman. But when she told me it was you, I thought about letting you starve." She rolled her eyes with a smirk. "So I hope you do appreciate it."
"Let me starve?!" he laughed. "What did I do?"
"You invited me to a mosquitoes' dinner party and said it would be fun. And maybe it was. But that's beside the point."
"Hey, that was only the first time, and I only did that to weed out the cowards." He winked. "I brought lemongrass the second time. I know what I'm doing."
She laughed. "Oh that's what that was about, sure." She narrowed her eyes and raised her eyebrows. "Well at least they weren't too bad when we were moving - and we were moving most of that time. But it's going to take more than a few bugs to scare me off. I love exotic things - show me anything exotic, I'll be there."
"This mulu stuff is exotic - to me anyway - so does that mean you'll sit down and have some with me?"
"Only if you tell me what I want to know," she bargained.
"Ask away," he said, throwing his arms out to his sides, "I'm an open book."
"That," she said, pointing to his open forearm, "where did you get that tattoo and why?" And she sat down.
"Oh," he laughed, sitting down. "Well it's called a new life mark. All Miranites have them--" he remembered his best friend-- "pretty much. The Miranite leader back home drew it on me when I told him I was ready to commit to the Miranite life. I was 14 then."
"But why is it a snake?" she asked. "When I first saw you, I thought you were one of those people who worship snakes. But you don't."
"It's symbolic of leaving an old life for a new one, as snakes shed their old skin for a new one."
"I see," she said. "So if I ever decide I want to be a Miranite, I'll get a snake stamped onto my right forearm?"
"Well, for you it would be right here--" he touched the part of his neck directly below his right ear-- "because you're a woman. But yeah, basically that's the seal of your commitment."
Mordramah pushed her hair behind her right ear. "You think I could pull off that look?" she smiled mischievously, biting her bottom lip.
"You could pull off any look!" he laughed.
And so commenced breakfast. The two talked and laughed and bantered to their hearts' content long past breakfast, and then, with nothing in particular he needed to do, he helped Mordramah do various chores for Neenan around the village until partway through the afternoon. And for the first time in a long time, Ajnin was in a good mood all day and forgot about Drea and her attitude. When he went to bed, he felt confident and attractive and on top of the world again, his old energy and motivation restored and his burdens forgotten, as he looked forward to ruling again the next day.
But when the next day came and the dawn began to shine into his room, he woke up with Viggo and Epifany on his mind. Viggo would never run away from his problems, he thought with a pang of guilt. Viggo would never distract himself with superficial fun when responsibilities weighed on him. It had been a month since Viggo's letter had come, requesting a visit from Ajnin and the girl he was trying to forget about. He decided it was his duty to take Drea with him if he could, but to be there for his friends at Battle Creek regardless. He had feared to leave Chang Khu without her, having no guarantee that he would find her again. But this morning he realized that it was indeed time for him to let go - and not by running away from his problems, but straight into them.
So he put on some boots, grabbed a fresh mulu from a basket, and climbed onto his horse before Mordramah even had time to come with a proper breakfast. As he headed toward that old tree outside the village, he was determined to do everything he could to push past the differences. And if the consequences weren't what he hoped and Drea was still too stubborn to leave, then so be it. Either way, he would be free, because whatever feelings he had for her would no longer determine his choices.
When he arrived, she was getting ready to check her traps. "Just wanted to let you know I'll be leaving within the next couple of days," he said. "You're still welcome to go with me if you want."
"No need for you to wait," she said, fastening the belt that held her machete to her waist. "I'd rather go alone any day." She looked frustrated.
"That's fine," he said, then before he could fully realize what he was saying, he went on, "but before I leave, I want to take you up on your offer and go with you to the forest and see how you hunt."
She laughed in apparent shock. "No you don't. Don't be ridiculous." She rolled her eyes and began to put on her thick snakeskin boots.
"No, you invited me, and now I wanna go!" his mouth insisted, while his heart said, Ajnin Hadassah, have you lost your mind? NO I don't want to go!
She looked uncomfortable. "It's not that simple. Your boots aren't tough enough to protect you if a brush serpent tries to bite you."
"I'll take my chances," he said, feeling something stranger than his normal sort of confidence guiding him.
"Yeah, and it'll be the death of you!" She began to quickly braid her hair as she walked outside the branches toward Shadyn.
Ajnin followed determinedly. "I didn't know you cared whether I lived or died," he teased.
"I don't!" Drea tried not to laugh. "You're completely insufferable! But I'm just warning you, I can't save your life if you go in there and get yourself bitten! I'm not my ma or Viggo, and you wouldn't last the trip there." She climbed onto her horse and he climbed onto his.
"You shouldn't worry about me," he said.
"When you're dying an awful death," she said, "don't say I didn't warn you." And they headed toward the forest.
The ride quickly became quiet and awkward from then on, and as they reached the border of the forest and left the horses, the expedition remained quiet and awkward. The silence was only broken by the rustling of leaves and twigs snapping under their boots as they walked deeper into the forest. When they came upon the first trap, the snake was feisty as it tried to break free. It lunged for Drea's leg, but couldn't reach, and with one fell swoop she sliced off its head, and a good portion of its neck with it. Ajnin remembered seeing plenty of her skins under her tree, but they never looked this sloppy and wasteful. "That's done," she said with a confident but slightly shaky tone. She looked nervous. But he didn't say anything. Was she uncomfortable doing her normal hobby in front of him? He wondered. If she was, he knew she'd never tell him.
By the time she'd checked all her traps and reset them, and separated the skins from their gory insides, the sun was directly overhead and it was getting hot. And Ajnin was hungry, as one mulu didn't keep him satisfied for too long, so he was glad to hear that it was time to go back. As they emerged from the trees, suddenly Drea flew into a panic. "Shadyn! NO!!" she screamed, running toward her black stallion. Ajnin ran after her, noticing the large brush serpent lunging for Shadyn's neck. "NO!" Drea roared, diving and grabbing the snake by the neck with her bare hands. But it was too late, and the horse took off running. The large, strong snake tried to bite Drea and almost overpowered her, but suddenly its head was on the ground in several messy pieces. Ajnin had taken the machete from her belt and used it.
Drea jumped to her feet, reeling, and ran after Shadyn, screaming his name. Trembling, Ajnin followed as fast as he could, catching up to her before they reached Shadyn, who had collapsed on the ground. Oh gods no, he thought, please no.
"No, no Shadyn, you'll be okay," she said with a trembling voice, caressing his face. It was all a blur after that. Shadyn lost consciousness shortly, his body in shock. With nothing they could do, Drea and Ajnin watched the magnificent creature slowly stop breathing as his neck swelled up and closed all airflow until his life ended and he was gone. Drea held his head in her arms, still petting him as her tears trickled onto his once majestic, now lifeless face. She pressed her cheek to his as Ajnin looked on in misery, wishing it wasn't happening or that there was something he could do to make it better. "I'm so sorry," he said. "Is there anything I can do to help?"
"You shouldn't have come!" she snapped, lifting her face and revealing angry eyes. "I don't need your help and I never did! Why don't you go help Mordramah carry some laundry baskets, you worthless flirt!"
He finally reached his most miserable moment of them all. He was already hurting, and the blame she threw at him added insult to injury. He wondered if it could have been his fault for coming, as she implied. But he also thought this wouldn't have happened had she not stayed in Chang Khu so long out of greed. And maybe she thought so too, and that was why she threw the blame on Ajnin instead. Regardless, he didn't have the heart to defend himself or rebuke her for her uncalled-for comments. Instead, he asked gently, "Do you want me to go ahead and leave Chang Khu without you then?"
"I can't stay here," she said. "I'm leaving as soon as possible and never coming back."
It wasn't how he'd anticipated it, but their journey was about to begin.
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